FISHBONE OF CONTENTION

Zodiac has been mocked for ages, as well as for its awkward consistency, its unwelcome magical quality and its irrefutable charm. Or maybe for its prepostrousness and lack of scientific evidence supporting the revelations it brought to the world and its wife. One of the two. Anyhow, much as I loath stereotypes (bollocks, but it's not the point and it fits right in), Zodiac's contribution to character judgement and everyday hate crimes is immense. Can you envision a world deprived of star sign bullshit and compartmentalization based on its transcendental, fairytale irresistibility? I can't. Bunches of adolescents not wasting valuable time and paper matter on prophecies never to be fulfilled and studying their asses off instead.. Bunches of housewives reading literature rather than horoscopes composed after hours by bunches of toasted editors gorging on doughnuts while laughing their asses off.. How eschatological.

But off we go, to the point. Zodiac rocks and it's the awkward consistency and validity of it that will be discussed now. I may not believe in horoscopes and zodiac-based matchmaking, but there's that one site which accounts for the appearance and character traits according to one's star sign and links it all adorably to the holy bible, holy mythology and holy shit. So as not to postpone the inevitable, I'll focus on myself. Being a Piscean, I am said to constitute a soul of selflessness, as compared to herrings and sardines who travel in large groups, losing their identity for the sake of the school (pardon me). Also, we lack the ability to set frontiers in life, as likened to our habitation's blurry, turbid quality. On the strength (or weakness) of the same comparison, the intuitive capacity to see more than the rest of you people is hampered, as not much can be seen on the other side apart from mere shapes. As for our health, feet are deemed to be particularly prone to pain and injuries. Achilles tendons sprained (both), one day paralysis in my childhood.. Could go on like this forever. Anything else? Ah yes. The exceptional inclination to fall for whatever is addictive in this world. Too true.

What I'm driving at is appearance though, which may be surprising after so many words preceding the confession. Not gonna quote, but it could be briefly put as.. a fishy look and stare. I had been doing my utmost to confute it, but then I met one of the plenty fish in the sea who is a Piscean and looks like one. And apparently, I do, too. Oh my god, I've said it. When something looks like fish and behaves like one, it is fish. Or seafood, at least. Thank god that the taste for seafood fluctuates from one individual to another.